I spent my 20's pretty much just content to drink anything that would make me feel tipsy, and on occasion, way too drunk to drive, thus needing a cab ride to get home. I also remember wanting to order all those "Fun" drinks.... You know the ones.... "Sex on the Beach", "Surfer on Acid".... And hey, when you are a 21 year old male and your bartendress is hot, what guy doesn't want to ask her for a "Blow Job"? Yeah, I was one of those guys.
Luckily, I grew up.
This brings me to a common misconception about drink names, or at least the classic drink names. After all, that sickening combination of Baileys and Kahlua topped off with sweetened whipped cream (gag) is fairly "new" to the scene. I am talking about those other favorites of the 20's generation. The Slow Screw, the Long Slow Screw, Long Slow Comfortable Screw followed by the resounding Long Slow Comfortable Screw Against the Wall. OYE!
Yeah, the names sound, well, naughty, and that is why they are ordered by the 20 somethings. But that is simply because they don't know how to speak "Bartender".
It's "Sloe" not Slow... As in Sloe Gin. A delightful combination of 70% Sloe berry Liqueur (made from the Buckthorn Plum) and 30% London Dry Gin.
But let's tear this down all the way.
The "Screw" refers to the Screwdriver of cocktail fame... You know, Vodka & OJ. The "Long" refers to the glass. Thus a "Long" drink is usually in a Highball glass (or a Collins). The "Wall"? No, it's not a Pink Floyd album either... It refers to Galliano, a quintessential element in the Harvey Wallbanger; which is a Screwdriver with a little Galliano. And trust me, if you have one too many of those, you will be banging into walls and every other inanimate object in your path. Finally, the "Comfortable" means Southern Comfort.
Let's run a full translation of these drinks in the Screwdriver family?
- Sloe Screw - Sloe Gin & Orange Juice in a rocks glass
- Long Sloe Screw - Sloe Gin, Vodka & Orange Juice in a Highball glass
- Sloe Comfortable Screw - Sloe Gin, Southern Comfort & Orange Juice in a rocks glass
- Long Sloe Comfortable Screw - Sloe Gin, Southern Comfort, Vodka & Orange Juice in a Highball Glass
- Long Sloe Comfortable Screw against the Wall - Slow Gin, Southern Comfort, Vodka, Galliano & Orange Juice in a Highball glass.
But I have digressed significantly from my original topic which was Slow Gin. I have noticed that it has become scarce in bars now days. Oh, don't get me wrong, the 21-25 crowd still order their Long Sloe Screws, but what they usually get is Grenadine and Vodka, not Sloe Gin.
So I want to actually talk about "Fizzes", and in particular, the Sloe Gin Fizz. Fizzes are basically "Sours" that have Club Soda or Seltzer (but sometimes sparkling wine) added to them.
There are several Fizz Cocktails, but I want to focus on the Gin Fizzes...
- Gin Fizz - Gin, Lemon, Lime, Sugar & Seltzer.
- Silver Fizz - Gin, Lemon, Lime, Sugar, Egg White & Seltzer
- Golden Fizz - Gin, Lemon, Lime, Sugar, Egg Yolk & Seltzer
- Royal Fizz - Gin, Lemon, Lime, Sugar, a Whole Egg & Seltzer
- Diamond Fizz - Gin, Lemon, Lime, Sugar & Sparkling Wine
- Finally, the Sloe Gin Fizz - Slow Gin, Lemon, Sugar & Seltzer
WARNING: Sloe Gin should not be tangled with lightly. It's not some "pretty in pink" liqueur to be scoffed at. The stuff packs a punch, particularly because you can't taste the liquor. But it IS in there, so don't treat this like some sort of adult Kool-Aid. Cause it sneaks up on ya and it packs a mighty fatal left hook.
A good English Sloe Gin is preferred, alas, I have not found one in the liquor store, so I go with de Kuyper brand,
because it claims to contain no artificial colors and no high fructose corn syrup.
(evidently, Sloe gin is sweetened in the U.S. which confounds reasoning, but oh well)
Sloe Gin Fizz
1 oz Simple Syrup (or Agave Syrup)
2 oz Fresh Lemon Juice (Bottled from concentrate isn't sour enough)
1 Jigger + 1 Pony (2 1/2 oz) Sloe Gin
Optional - 1 Egg White (the alcohol "cooks" the egg, supposedly)
Ice (or course)
4-5 oz Seltzer Water
Prep first..... Squeeze and strain your lemon juice. (My lemons were small, so it required 1 1/2 lemons to make 2 oz of juice)
Fill the shaker with ice and set aside.
Pour 1 oz (Pony) simple syrup or agave syrup into the glass.
Add 2 oz (2 Ponies) strained Lemon Juice.
Add 2 1/2 oz Sloe Gin (that's a Jigger and a Pony)
Add 4-5 oz of Seltzer water.
Pour over the ice in the shaker.
Cover the shaker and give it a couple good shakes to mix it up and cause some "fizz".
(If you added the egg white, it will trap the fizz; forming the quintessential fizzy "head" on the drink)
Pour into a Highball Glass.
Add a Lemon slice and 2 ice cubes. (there should be a maraschino cherry wrapped in the lemon, but I don't even like the smell of them, so I leave them out)
Add a straw and kick back so you can enjoy your "Cherry Phosphate".
There use to be an old time soda fountain in old Gresham when I was a kid, they served old-fashioned phosphates. That is what this cocktail always reminds me of.